I'm gonna be a schoolkid :), AGAIN!

Hey, long time since I told you what I was up to. Yesterday I went to examine the possibilities of going back to school. I would like to get an Associates degree first but then Bachelor's in the field of Gallery Management.

I have been unemployed since February and applied to over 5 jobs a week and still have only had two interviews. I have an Associates in Computer Info Systems from 1997 and since I was a single momma raising two babies in the city, was never able to cement myself into a serious enough position to move up the corporate ladder, and now my 12 year old technology education is pretty much obsolete (insert every single-mom inner city sob story here, no one's gonna listen anyway).

So yeah, got my first degree basically for nothing, I thought, until I realized I could go back to school and transfer in all the core classes from the first go-'round and do it again. Why not? I'm only 40, and believe me, I saw ALL ages there when I was registering yesterday, many older than me (phew!!).

Many of you may think I'm slacking but alas, I am otherwise preoccupied with NOT GIVING UP and PRESSING ON and harnessing all the positive maniacal energy I can cram into one soul and sometimes am just too riled to even sit down. As I sit here, I look forward to dropping my daughter off at work and walking the 5+ miles round trip down to the Hudson River and back today for a "karmic recharge" and the possibility that a few of that fat cells that sooo love my ample bouncing booty might jump ship and lighten my load a little!

I apologize for not reading all your excellent blogs I so appreciate and of which I am a fan in the timely fashion I would like. I always learn great things and am definitely inspired by the beautiful people I have met through blogging and Twitter. I DO look at them when I get some free time and that does happen once in a while...

So please, as always bear with me for like most of you I am a rare bird that marches to the beat of her own stuttering rhythm and sometimes don't know what to do first. I am forging ahead with my big size 11 feet and cutting a path to happiness :)

Also I hope I can inspire some of you to NEVER GIVE UP because when you do, that's when you are defeated. No matter how down you are, no one can take away your conviction and perseverance, your sense of self and your contribution to humanity.
~ a "warm fuzzies" wave of "mmmmmmm..." :) ~
be good to yourselves....
Vicki

why I'm busy (not painting) today, and my continuing saga of single parenthood

All I want to do today is paint a pretty picture of my friend's beautiful green-eyed kitty...

This is the tail end of a looooong story...

My kids and I opened a Child Support Case in 1997. By 2002 I finally started getting consistent payments. We were receiving 85 dollars a week. New York State law states that for two children the noncustodial parent will pay 25% of their income, plus a fair share of any education costs.

We are STILL getting 85 dollars a week! My ex husband brags about $150 remote control cars that HE plays with), going out, his motorcycle, their three poodles, going to Florida, and alll kinds of things that he can enjoy. His son asked him for $168 to take his A+ Certification Exam that he studied all year for. He said he didn't have it. His daughter has asked him for $70 towards her driving learner's permit. He says she doesn't need it (she turned 16 in MARCH!!). He also doesn't understand that kids cost 50% more in the summer. Suddenly I am coming up with snacks and lunches for two that we didn't have to pay for when they are in school.

We haven't been to a summer fair in years. I've never been able to take them to an amusement park, or even the ocean! For fun, we play in the woods.... I am grateful we live in such a beautiful area. The only drawback is that jobs are limited so only one of my kids is working. Albany is 20 miniutes away and for Andrew to get his license, we would need to pay about 500 more a year on our car insurance.

He has a bitter and depressed girlfriend who hates his children and makes it hard for him to bear when they visit (my kids feel it and hate this). They only see him about once a year, if they are lucky. Even then, he won't unless we split the 3 hour's drive transportation. I wish he would just stand up to her and be a man and the Dad he's so capable of being. He is a very sweet and fun guy, when he wants to be.

I've asked for a few bucks for school clothes, and was berated and called names by his girlfriend (of ten years, who has her own money and puts all their assets in her name). The kids and I spent 6 months in a homeless shelter in 1997 while I was attending college.... you think he would have cared.

My daughter had a teenage crisis and I begged him to take her for a couple weeks and he says "You guys seem to forget what I do for a living... I'm a truck driver, I'm all over the place!". Funny, I can't drive trucks, I have kids!! So does he but he fails to acknowledge that they are growing human beings with needs, besides the fact that they KNOW he could see them if he REALLY wanted to. PLUS, if I am getting only $85 a week, there might be an issue; I believe truck drivers make more than 340 a week! I mean, we've been getting the same for over 10 years!

So please, dear reader, bear with me. Today I am going to Albany to file a "Petition of Upwards Modification". I think we will get a little fulfillment, however, knowing my ex, he will just get a job off the books to avoid taking care of his kids. The thing he's going to realize though, is that they are not little kids anymore and even though I've never said anything negative about him to them, they have made their own deductions based on his actions/nonaction.

I just wanted to give you all a quick heads up with the least amount of drama portrayed as possible.

Please keep me in your thoughts today and send me positive energies!

In the meantime, I'm going to take a killer walk while I'm in Albany and get some pics for you all. There's a pretty real pic of me below, knee brace included, lol. We (myself, son and his adorable gf) only did 1 1/2 miles yesterday, but I made a little "Virtual tour" of my jaunt and will finish my composition today after I go to Family Court if I get time and you should see it here this weekend....

Hugs to you all and thanks for listening. I am feeling guilty, behind on my blog reading, and my Twitter but will make it up to you over the weekend!!

My Wow OMG walk yesterday

I took the best walk yesterday. I walked with Ray to the Hudson via a gorgeous route of breathtaking views, cared-for lawns, trees that held some of the best berries we've ever eaten, butterflies lighting on vibrant blossoms, baby bald eagles, magestic blue herons, and enjoyed an amazingly brisk breeze that graced us from the river all the way back :).

I'm taking my camera next time. I try not to, bc it slows down my heart rate, but just HAVE to share!